What Are You Afraid Of, God?

What Are You Afraid Of, God?

Lucifer enters Heaven one day to have a casual conversation with God. He does this every now and then to escape the humdrum landscape in Hell.

“Hey G!” Lucifer sits on the grass, softest grass he has ever sat on, watching God sculpt something on top of a makeshift stone altar.

“What can I do for you Lucifer? I am quite busy.”

“Are you making another gender in there? I need to tell you, you’ve got to stop.” Lucifer said staring closely.

“Excuse meeee, I did not create those. I only made 2. They are patented. Man thought of the rest. Truth be told, it’s tiring. But hey…Image and Likeness, right?”

“See, that’s the problem with you. You let these things happen. No wonder people come to me and sell their souls. My secretary is sick and tired of creating contracts every minute. Why can’t you just give everyone what they want? What are you afraid of?”

“I am certainly not afraid of anything. Tell your secretary she needs a vacation, in Paradise. She can come here.” God laughed at his own joke.

“Oh Hell no!” Lucifer said shaking his head. “People think I am this ugly evil maniac who is after them, I don’t want any more human beings! Hell is crowded. Yesterday, I was face to face with Ted Bundy. We almost kissed. It’s that crowded.”

“You are not ugly, Lucifer. I created you.”

“I know, they made a stupid series out of me. I am more handsome than that guy!”

“Not as handsome as Elvis Presley, but, yeah, close” God shrugged his shoulders.

“Speaking of, is the King here? He is definitely not down there.” They both looked at each other in disbelief.

“So he is still missing?!” God sighed and continued sculpting.

“What are you afraid of, G? Are you scared that humans will finish each other off in greed and hate and you will be left with bacteria and all that? Those things don’t worship you. They still blame bacteria on me, Jesus!”

“You don’t have to bring my son into the picture, he is busy. And don’t you dare go out tempting him again! He said you were a real pain in the ass that time.  Once again, I am not scared of anything. Why don’t you go back to your office, see what you can do to improve living conditions?”

“Then it won’t be Hell anymore! You know what I think? I think you’re scared that in every good person, a part of me also exists in them. You are scared I might take over.” Lucifer gave him a mischievous smile, stood up and walked away.

“He could be right.” God muttered under his breath. “Now let’s see what we have here.”

God looked at a globe he created. It will be bigger than Jupiter, more deep verdant greens and azure. Splashes of white and patches of brown.

“I hope they’re ready.”

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