She Made Me Do It
Right now, I hate her for coming into my life and with all her might tried to make me hike and climb. I spent so much on climbing gear and shoes just to please her but, I never used them. For thirty-five years, I have been comfortable. I don’t like walking long distances and I don’t like the heat of the sun. Trees and mountains don’t make me giddy inside. She’s crazy about them. I have no fucking idea why. She’s weird and at this very moment, I wish I never met her.
“Let’s climb this weekend!” She says in her charged, high pitched voice.
“No. Doctor’s appointment, remember?”
“Boring.” She’d walk away and skulk into her room. I have to convince myself that maybe she was some mountain-dwelling animal in her past life.
Now here I am, climbing one of her favorite mountains. The hardest one. The rockiest one. The one with so many twists and turns, moss that made me slip and slide resulting in bruises of various colors. My knees hurt like hell that I pray for a helicopter ride back. I can see her smiling and enjoying herself while seeing me sweat profusely. She wanted this. All those years of pushing me to climb, it would have to be this day, of all days.
When I reached the peak, I went a little closer to the edge and heard her laughter.
“You did it! I love you!”
She was right. It is different up here. Calmer than the rest of the world. Maybe that’s why she would rather be here than be with me or be anywhere else. The wind was cold but her loss was more biting. I took out the silver urn she chose weeks ago. It had ornate designs of leaves at the base. I can’t believe it’s her inside. I opened it and scattered what she is now. One with everything.
“Well baby, congratulations. You made me do it.”